Relationship blog

Relationship blog

torsdag 28 december 2017

Once a cheater always a cheater.

If you have ever been cheated on you know the emotional trauma that comes with it. Infidelity is one of the few mistakes in a relationship that is powerful enough to feel on a physical level. It is almost as if someone hit you in the gut with a big fist of disbelief.


Trust is a precious thing that you should treat with the utmost caution. It's kind of like the Humpty Dumpty of bonds in a relationship. People tend to toss it around without realizing how fragile it really is.

Once it breaks they realize how impossible it seems to be to put it back together. Make sure you only give your trust away to people you can rely on. If the person you want to give your trust to has already violated it once, don't hand it right back to them without making sure they will respect it.

So if someone is a cheater, will they always be one? It would be nice if there was a clear answer to this question. Unfortunately every person in the world is different. Some can change and commit themselves faithfully while others will eventually fall back into betrayal.

Don't let a simple apology and a seemingly sincere promise persuade you into taking someone back. There are things you can do to find out whether or not someone is capable of being trusted a second time.

The first and most important thing is to determine the reason your partner cheated in the first place. People cheat for a variety of reasons, some of which are clear indicators that it may happen again.

1. Lack Of Respect - Some people could care less about their partner's feelings or the commitment they shared. Did your partner cheat simply because they didn't respect you? Chances are if they cheated and show no remorse, they will continue to be unfaithful.

2. They Were Getting Little Attention - Sometimes when people aren't faithful to their partner it is because they want to get noticed. If someone is neglected for long enough, they might take drastic action to make things change. Many people end up finding out they played a major role in why their partner cheated.

Free stock photo of sea, beach, vacation, bikini
Once a cheater always a cheater.

3. The Relationship Was Getting Boring - A lot of affairs take place just for the thrill factor. When a relationship gets boring and dull, people tend to look for excitement.

If you experienced a lack of intimacy and not enough positive interaction there is a good chance this is why your partner cheated.

These are just a few common reasons people cheat. It could be a lot more complicated and difficult to figure out for certain couples. Once you have the motives figured out you have to ask yourself one question: Can you change the reason? The answer to this question is the easiest way to determine whether or not more cheating could be in your future with this partner.

If you can't work together as a couple to fix the problem you are out of luck. As long as the problem persists you are bound to experience the same consequences.

There are a lot of people who foolishly think the problem will solve itself and end up falling into a reckless pattern of emotional discourse.

If you can work together to make changes there is hope, but it doesn't guarantee they will change. Proceed with caution before giving your trust back. Take things slow and pay great attention to the way your relationship is building back up.

Even if you feel comfortable with them again, you need to be positive they have earned your trust. Before you decide whether or not to give your trust back to someone, think about how you felt when you were betrayed.

It isn't something people like to remember, but it is important to know that it could happen again if they aren't careful enough.
 Sadly, the majority of relationships that ended because of a cheating partner are bound to fail. If the bond is strong enough however, there is no reason you can't work through it and find your way back to a happy couple again.

Read how 50,119 people found love again!

tisdag 26 december 2017

Relational Strain Caused by Finances

Money affects day to day life more than almost any other force. Religious texts and folk wisdom all speak to how money should be handled by individuals, couples and families. Talk to almost any couple, regardless of their financial standing, and they will likely confess the majority of their discussions center around money. Knowing the pitfalls of financial concerns brought about by this topic, couples need a solid game plan to navigate these choppy waters.


Talking About the Monster

Couples without any conversations about money matters find themselves either in large scale fights or dissolving under the grinding weight of its pressure. The worst course of action is never having a single serious conversation about finances. Everyone's upbringing, education and experience with money is different. This colors how they relate to all sorts of circumstances. Without knowing a partner's feelings about finances, one might accidentally violate a core belief damaging the relationship. The couple needs to determine what is important to them as a unit and how they are going to proceed. Without frank discussion, couples will never be able to move onto the next step.

Setting a Road Map

Planning sounds like the most boring way to address anything in a relationship. Funny thing about money is life presents unpredictable circumstances alone. In this modern age, a serious accident or fluctuations in industries bring about changes to a couple's financial standing. In light of vast uncertainty, making a plan and discussing the plan becomes more critical.

Budgeting: A map is easier to follow when things are set. That's why roads and landmarks do not change overnight. Think how much harder it would be to get to the office everyday if everything changed on a whim. The first budget is the hardest because no one wants to feel hemmed into a corner where they can not spend what they want for what they want. The important thing to remember about a budget is how it demonstrates what the couple holds the most dear because they are planning for a particular outcome whether saving for a house or planning for a big trip. Also, budgets are working documents. They can be changed based on goals, accurate data and unexpected changes.

Close-up of Couple Holding Hands
Relational Strain Caused by Finances 

Deviating: With an established budget, a couple proves better able to steer toward a good opportunity when it presents itself. A great house becomes available before they expected, but the couple can see areas they can cut in the short term to help them reach a larger goal quicker. Those without a clear vision of the future or how they move toward it will not be able to pivot quickly enough and might miss out on an ideal situation.

Saying "No"

Talking and planning sound like challenging mental exercises, but the kind where both partners are on the same page. While true in theory, the greatest arguments come when a denial exists. We are hardwired to fight against hearing no. Tell a toddler in the grocery store they can not have a bag of candy at the check out. How do they respond? Do they wait to hear the wisdom against having too much sugar or how a meal is right around the corner? Hopefully, adults in such situations do better, but they tend to not like hearing no either. Here are some points that might help.

* Reminding each other of the end goal and not momentary want.
* Emphasizing the partnership and how both are working together.
* Offering to discuss it later when cooler heads return.

Partners don't want to say no to one another because they prefer to shower each other with love, acceptance and anything else the other wants. However, sometimes the kindest thing is not giving in because it would be the easier thing to do.

Money, thought challenging, brings opportunities. Couples who save for a trip can experience a location with less stress. Wrangling money matters within the confines of their relationship allows couples another area in which to communicate effectively and bring them closer. Draw nearer and have the tough discussions now. It will pay dividends in the future.

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torsdag 21 december 2017

Sex and Fidelity

Let’s face it: casual sex is everywhere. Sitcoms on television glorify the idea of sleeping with the boyfriend/girlfriend of the week, fiction books glamorize affairs and one-night stands, musicians pen ballads about the wonders of relationships based on physical attraction. 


Sex between consenting adults is perfectly accepted in society, until it happens between your spouse and another consenting adult. Suddenly that barroom pick-up line song takes on a whole new meaning when confronted with the reality that your spouse picked someone else up and took them home for their own episode of casual sex. Sex is (and should be) a sacred part of marriage.

Imagine if these were the vows during a wedding ceremony:

"I, (insert name), take you (spouse’s name) to be my lawfully wedded wife. I promise to love you, and cherish you, and will be faithful to you until I find someone more attractive. Then, I will probably have sex with them, but will still love you and cherish you. I may find someone else that I want to have sex with but don’t worry. You’re the most important one in my life."

No one would sign up for that kind of deal!

While study after study shows that a lack of sex is not the only reason a person cheats, it is definitely a factor in an affair. It is with good reason that a proactive approach to warding off an affair includes an active sex life: sex is important (not to mention fun).

Make sex a priority in your relationship. One woman, whose mom was trying to be helpful before her daughter’s wedding, told her to always have a load of laundry nearby that needs to be done. The implication being that if you can have an excuse to get out of sex, you should take it.

Free stock photo of couple, love, bedroom, kissing
Sex and Fidelity

That kind of thinking is what helps to set the stage for infidelity later. Regardless of your sex life (or lack thereof) it’s never your fault if your spouse cheats. However, you stack the odds in your favor if the issue of sex is never an issue.

While we will leave the particulars of your sex life to you, there are a few pieces of advice we will give:

• More is better. Some couples commit to being intimate every day for a year. Some choose a shorter amount of time as a means to strengthen the marital bond. Talk together with your spouse and see if this is something that would be helpful in your relationship.

• Variety is nice. Try something new – a new location, a new position, a new outfit. You don’t have to go any shades of gray to have a sex life that is varied and exciting.

• Talking is good. Communication is a key component in a relationship – and is equally important within your sex life. Talk/text/email about how you’re looking forward to date night, how much your intimacy the night before meant to you, about how you got a new outfit that you can’t wait for him to see in bed tonight.

Sex is a powerful tool in your relationship – use it as a tool for good.

NEW! Now You Can Stop Your Separation, Divorce or Lovers Rejection…Even If Your Relation Seems Hopeless!

If you Want Him Back, I’ll show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your lover back in your arms – Especially if you are the only one trying…

The Secret you need to know to reverse your separation! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!


tisdag 19 december 2017

Should You Even Try to Win Your Ex Back?

In the first few days, even weeks, after your breakup, the only thing you can think about is how to get your ex back. It's understandable. Depending on how long the two of you were together, you've shared a lot of life. It's hard to just walk away and pretend it never happened.


The odds are good that your ex isn't walking off unaffected either. The only real difference is that your ex has been thinking about this for a while. People don't walk away from long-term-relationships on a whim. In other words, your ex has had a little more time to deal with the emotional side of the decision than you have.

If you're struggling to decide if the right choice is to walk away or fight to get your ex back, these questions should help you decide.

Is the Love Still There?

This is a huge question you need to know the answer to before you make a single step to try and win your ex back. While you can only guess about how your ex really feels, you can, and should, explore your own feelings in depth before making your next move. If the love isn't really there, you should not waste your time and energy, or that of your ex, trying to rekindle something that's simply not there anymore.

Printer Paper Cut With Orange Scissor
Should You Even Try to Win Your Ex Back?

Is the Relationship You Had Truly Worth Rehashing?

Most relationships have their shares of ups and downs. Successful relationships have far more ups in them than downs. Take a look back over the course of your entire relationship. How do the ups compare to the downs for you? Were the good times really good? How bad were the darkest days? Are you willing to experience them again if necessary?

How far are You Really Willing to Go to Make It Work?

You must be willing to do whatever it takes to make it work in most cases for that to happen. Your ex is likely to throw in a few pitfalls and tests along the way, if he or she is even willing to give it a go. Be prepared for them and ready to ace them with flying colors. Don't even think about letting her see you sweat. But the willingness goes even deeper than passing a few tests. You must be willing to make a few vital changes for the sake of your relationship. But you won't often find out what they are until the moment arrives. Just be prepared. Some of the changes may not be all that simple to make.

Most importantly, however, is your willingness to be the one to wait. This is often the most difficult, and most necessary, part of winning back your ex. Waiting for the right moment, though, makes all the difference in the world. I can help you understand when that moment is and help you come up with the ideal strategy to turn it into a prime opportunity.

NEW! Now You Can Stop Your Separation, Divorce or Lovers Rejection…Even If Your Relation Seems Hopeless!

If you Want Him Back, I’ll show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your lover back in your arms – Especially if you are the only one trying…

The Secret you need to know to reverse your separation! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!


fredag 15 december 2017

Signs Your Girlfriend is Getting Ready to Walk Away

Relationships aren't always easy. Signals get crossed. You take each other for granted. Life sometimes gets in the way. Sometimes this leads to one or both of you being unhappy and unsure of what move to make next. While communicating these feelings would be an excellent start, life doesn't always work out that way. Sometimes, she just starts making plans to leave. But what are the signs your girl's got leaving on her mind?

She Stops Making Plans for the Future

At least, she stops making plans for the future with you. She's stopped sharing them with you. She's stopped asking what's on the calendar and trying to talk you into going to family events, planning for vacations, or anything else along those lines. She's even stopped talking about future living arrangements. That's a huge red flag that all isn't right in paradise.


Girls are forever making plans for the future. In fact, women begin planning their wedding days in kindergarten right down to the dress, flowers, cake, and party favors. It's a big deal. When she stops hinting at wedding bells down the road, it means her mind is moving on. Her body will follow soon.

She's Suddenly Started Working Longer Hours or Looking for a New Job

Women get worried about their ability to support themselves right about the time they plan to leave a relationship. This is especially true if you're living together and/or if there are children involved. Financial independence will be extremely important to her as it may determine her ability to support herself and her child or children.

Two People With Heart Shape Balloons in Winter
Signs Your Girlfriend is Getting Ready to Walk Away

The extra hours at work help her set aside a bit of a nest egg so that she doesn't walk away from the relationship with nothing. A new job can represent higher income and opportunities for advancement in the future.

She's Spending Less and Your Joint Savings aren't Growing

The money is going somewhere. Either she's socking it away somewhere or she's spending it on someone (or something else). Unless you have a birthday coming up or Christmas is close, this is typically cause for concern.

The key, in each of these situations, however, is not to panic. She may be thinking about leaving, but she hasn't left yet. You still have time to turn the tides in your favor. You just need the proper roadmap to follow that all but guarantees your success. Follow the right map and you'll find your way back into her heart and good graces in no time.

NEW! Now You Can Stop Your Separation, Divorce or Lovers Rejection…Even If Your Relation Seems Hopeless!

If you Want Him Back, I’ll show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your lover back in your arms – Especially if you are the only one trying…

The Secret you need to know to reverse your separation! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!


onsdag 13 december 2017

Simple Truths Every Girl Needs to Know about Her Guy

Girls often have a hard time relating to the guys they love. There is a lot of truth to the 1990's Mars and Venus book series by Dr. John Gray. Men and women seem to speak and understand different languages from one another.

Girls don't understand what their guys are really saying and get their feelings hurt quite often when no negativity was implied from the guy at all. Then he's baffled that she's suddenly giving him the silent treatment and holding back tears.


Then the you know what hits the fan and it's flying dishes and fireworks everywhere.

But it doesn't HAVE to be that way. There are a few simple truths that could very well be relationship savers when girls figure them out about their men.

1) He Really Does Think about Nothing

It's true. And every girl doubts it. You ask him what he's thinking about. He says nothing. You get upset or hurt that he isn't sharing with you. You think he's hiding something from you. The truth is, he really isn't thinking about a darn thing. If anything you might be jealous that you can't harness that power yourself to see what it feels like to really think about nothing at all.

2) He Loves You Just the Way You Are

He really does. The only problem is that he never wants you to change. He'd be happiest if you'd stay the way you were the day you met forever. He wants you all flirty, happy, eager to impress, and lovey dovey. He doesn't want that to end.

Free stock photo of sea, person, beach, vacation
Simple Truths Every Girl Needs to Know about Her Guy

3) He Doesn't Like Change

He doesn't want you to change, as we've already mention, but he also doesn't want to change himself. That's why he's so reluctant to eat healthier, start exercising, or cut out the salt. He really would be happy to have meatloaf every Monday, sit in the same recliner for fifty years, and drive the same truck until the tires fell off. It's also why he has a not to subtle panic attack (though he'll deny that until his dying day) whenever you start to make changes.

4) He has Emotional Needs Too

Women often mistake their husbands, boyfriends, etc. for people who lack emotional depth. The thing is, men have deep feelings. They don't wear their emotions on their sleeves. Those waters run very deep. He may not profess his undying love for you every day, he may never be the Hallmark man of the year, but his love for you and his family is something he feels down deep and he needs reassurance from you, that his love is returned.

Once you understand these simple truths about the guys you love, you may find a new understanding for the dynamics in your relationship. Hopefully, you'll have a new appreciation for the man you love and what really drives him in life so your relationship can be stronger than ever before.

If you Want Him Back, I’ll show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your lover back in your arms – Especially if you are the only one trying…

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